Love is a terrifying thing, isn’t it? You follow the one you want closely, slowly losing yourself; changing your looks and attitude match their wants. You open up to them more than you’ve opened up anyone before; all caution thrown out the window. But at the same time, you become a coward; afraid of rejection if/when you confess them. So, you hide yourself behind the title of ‘friend’ or ‘best friend.’

New feelings come into play when they tell you they’ve started to take an interest in some person. At first you’re hurt, but you hide that fact and forcefully ask who the person is. They’re hesitant for a second and then they burst out telling you who it is and for hours;they tell you everything about that person; all the while, you smile and nod at everything they say, pain welling up within you. When they ask you for advice, you smile again and give them an answer.

Soon, you see them with the one they’re interested in, putting your advice into action. You feel jealousy grow within you and you decide to try and divert their attention from the other. It starts with witty comments and glares that causes their blood to boil, but you’re happy because they notice you. However, your jealousy grows into anger and now the same actions you did to get their attention begins to push them away from you, towards the other person. Your actions start to push them away rather than bringing them closer.

Guilt is the next feeling in the line. You watch from a distance as they laugh and hang out with the other and you realize just how much they really like them. You realize you only thought about yourself; that you kept saying you loved them more than anyone, yet wasn’t willing to let them go. In hopes to at least save your friendship, you apologize to them and say you’re glad that the both of them were together. They look at you with soft eyes and thank you; your friendship is saved.

Unfortunately, one last feeling is up to the plate. Behind a mask you’ve carefully formed; depression takes its toll on you. Your friends, even the new couple, worry about you and you’re grateful for their concern, but you say you’re fine, just a little stressed. They buy your excuse and leave you peace. Time moves on and you continue to watch the new couple, depression growing. You tell yourself, “As long as they’re happy. As long as they’re happy…” and that keeps you sane for a bit...

- the story above was a prologue to a certain fanfic in @Soshified, I really loves how the author narrate the whole story and put everything into one big picture. I'm trying to search around to give proper credit to the author but for the time being to no avail. For the time being the credit goest to @Soshified, once I found the author I'll give proper credit for them -